So that rant in my last post, where so many of you tried to cheer me up? I've discovered the cause - I was hungry as hell that night. I didn't feel that hunger as one normally feels it (a pain in the general stomach region), because I don't, not since I've started PD. I only remember to eat before every exchange because I remember the faintness and dizziness that came over me once when I hadn't been eating right.
That was the day I filled the whole 2.5 litres, because I wasn't paying attention. So the usual feeble signals that I get from my stomach were also completely absent (that little gnawing sensation was simply not there that day). I completely forgot to have dinner. And so I had myself a huge bout of self-pity, compounded by the fact that it'd only been a few days since Amma left, so I was missing her like crazy, I hadn't yet settled into an Amma-less routine. That's where the rant came from. I've not stopped missing Amma, but I'm sloooowly settling into that Amma-less routine I mentioned.
Yesterday, I was feeling really whiny and close to tears, for no apparent reason - snapping at poor CMR even though she is likely under even more pressure than me at work, being on two projects at once. I was a BEAR all through our team conference call last night. And then it hit me - I hadn't had my dinner. Then I also realized that that vague nausea I'd had all evening was my poor stomach signaling that it had much too much acid and not enough food in it. Palm, meet forehead! I almost knocked myself out with that thwack :P
Some of the dumb things I do, I tell ya!
Now when I feel all whiny and run-down, I remember this lesson and go eat something nutritious. I have finally learned to pay attention to what my body tells me. Typical conversation:
Me: "What now?!"
Body: "Go take some Tums, dummy - I'm being eaten up with acid!"
Me: "Oh, yes, now that you mention it... I am feeling that little twinge of acidity."
And now I really have to go take some Tums.
PS: It is really amazing how much my body's internal voice sounds like big sister's :P